Thursday, February 16, 2012

From Swarna in NJ, USA

Fawzia was my best friend and she was my “adopted” sister. She has been a part of my life for more than thirty years, half the time she spent on this earth. We first met in 1982 when we were in Oman and became best friends. She would visit me several times a year, and although distances separated us often, she would always make it a point to keep her visits regular. In 1987, when she moved to the United States, it was her help, kindness and encouragement that led me to where I am today.

What stands out in my mind when I think about my dear friend Fawzia is what a good person she was. When I decided to apply for a residency in the USA, she filled more than twenty applications for me. Because of her, I came to the States. After having my second son, Fawzia took time off to help me take care of him in 1992. Fawzia’s best qualities showed when things weren’t going so well in my family. She was always there for me and she was an anchor in my life.

In 1999, she was diagnosed with breast cancer, but she was too strong to let it take over her life. It was very sad for me when she moved to Hong Kong, but she still came to visit us – always making a point to be a part of my life and my sons’. My last trip with Fawzia was when she came traveled with me to visit colleges for my younger son. We drove south up to South Carolina, west up to Pittsburgh, and north up to Boston with her and we would’ve been lost without her help and guidance. I had no navigation system but Fawzia was a master at reading maps. I am so happy God gave me that time to be with her without knowing her life will be cut too short.


I already miss her so much that words cannot describe her loss. I am so saddened by her loss and I am grieving as much as I did when my Mom and Dad passed. She was my Angel. If I was going through a tough time she would pray for me and I was counting on those prayers to work. I am going to miss her calls on my birthday and New Year, but I know she is in a better place because she was such a good, kind-hearted person who helped everybody who came across her life, rich or poor, good or bad. I’m sorry I could not be there personally to say goodbye to my dearest and my best friend, but I know she will hear me when I go to the temple today to pray for her.

We had retirement plans to either live in her house in Sri Lanka when I retired, or she would come to live in mine in New Jersey. We planned to travel together to countries we had not visited. We planned to go round the world on the Queen Mary. Then we would enjoy our retirement and take care of each other until we were 90. One day Fawzia asked who would go first, and I said we will be in our 90's and nobody would know the other person was gone due to Alzheimer’s or dementia. So no one would feel the loss. I never imagined that she would leave me orphaned. I’m so sad that I won’t have my best friend there with me to enjoy all the things we haven’t seen yet, done yet. But now she is in a place where she can see everything, the whole world!

When we spoke last on New Year’s Day she told me she would not come to see me this year but she would visit me 2013, and, although she won’t make it, I know that I will see her again someday and she will look-over all of us from heaven.

My dear Fawzi, I apologize I could not come to see you before you passed. I hope you knew how sad I was to hear the bad news, and you did not give me enough time to come and see you to say Good Bye. But I want you to know I was planning to come and see you in Sri Lanka a week after you made through this horrible event. Now I know why they say that "The Good die young"

I will miss you for the rest of my life.

Have peace in Heaven and may God be with you until the eternity.

Your best friend, your sister,

Dr. Swarna Jayasinghe

New Jersey, USA

Swarna with Nelum

At Roy's wedding. Gainesville, FL, 31/12/2009